Relationship tips are a dime a dozen. Except when they come from Brendon Burchard. Brendon has a unique way of teaching and making his point. His style, content, and delivery are always amazing. I am happy to bring you this video he did about relationships. I’ll expand on his 3 main points and show where his 3 tips are in line with top relationship experts.
Run of the Mill Relationship Tips
We often hear the usual run of the mill relationship tips.
- 1Communicate more
- 2Be kind to your partner
- 3Show respect
- 4Help your partner
- 5Spend quality time together
Blah, blah, blah.
We hear these so often they all sound the same. While they are still good tips, their repetitive nature takes away from their usefulness. We need better ways to communicate the essentials. In comes Brendon Burchard. I’ve followed Brendon’s teachings for several years on a variety of topics. He is one of my mentors. He always has a unique way of getting his message across, and he is a stellar communicator. Check out his 3 relationship tips in this video. Or, watch it below:
Paying Attention, Being Present, is Key
Brendon makes it clear that we need to pay attention to our partner, spouse, love interest, or significant other. These days our attention is short lived. We scan TV channels, play video games, scan web pages, and always reach for the phone anytime it beeps. Our attention spans are getting shorter, and our relationships are suffering. Too often we are not being present or mindful of who we are with and our surroundings. Brendon Burchard offers the following 3 relationship tips.
3 Relationship Tips from Brendon Burchard
#1 - Be Present and Pay True Attention to Your Partner
Many believe that they can be present with their love interest when both are in the same room watching TV. No. That is not being present with your partner. Being present is when you are both paying attention to one another. This website is all about spending quality time together to build happy relationships. I promote the family meal as the perfect time to pay true attention.
Brendon says that true attention is about presence, not presents. While I see where he’s going with that, I do slightly disagree with him here. When I refer to Gary Chapman and his 5 love languages, presents, or gifts, is one of the love languages. If your partner has a primary love language of gifts, quality time will be less effective than presents.
I think the most important point here is to really know your partner, act on their primary love language, and yes, pay true attention to them as much as possible.
Appreciate the Totality of Your Spouse
When we start to date someone, and fall in love, we are blinded by all the good things we see in them. As time goes on and routines are established, we start to see all the negatives. That is normal. We have to remember that just as we are seeing the negatives in our partner, they are seeing the negatives in us also. If we are to have a happy relationship, we need to appreciate everything of our partner, not just the good.
Brendon makes a point to use the example of having a conversation. In the conversation your spouse may be telling you what happened in their day. You may or may not be interested in it. But, if you are to really appreciate the totality of your partner, you need to pay attention to it and appreciate everything. After your partner is finished, it’s a good idea, as Dr. John Gray of the Mars and Venus book fame suggests, reply back with things like:
You need to appreciate everything about your partner.
Adore Your Love Interest
When you do the above 2 tips, the third is easy. You must adore your spouse. You must hold them with high esteem and show them love, respect, and honor. Emerson Eggerichs talks about this in his book series called Love & Respect. Both partners need equal amounts of love and respect. However, when times are difficult and there is conflict, Dr. Eggerichs points out that the husband needs more respect and the wife needs more love. Without it, a couple can enter into the crazy cycle, which when not corrected, can lead to irreparable harm.
Brendon uses a great example of adoring your partner. He says he often tries to make his wife blush at public gatherings by him showering her with adoration. When was the last time you made your partner blush by heaping praise on them?
I hope you enjoyed the video. He gives good examples of his points. His 3 relationship tips are special and not the normal tips we so often are told.
A great place to practice these 3 relationship tips is at the family dinner table. If you are not having family meals 5 or more times a week, you are doing your relationship a disservice. With a captive audience, it’s an easy place to put these relationship tips into practice.